"How does he do that?",
my dad asked on my phone this morning while I was pulling out of the driveway, still able to see me.

"I have NO idea,"
I replied.

Let me explain.

My next door neighbor is old.
And lonely.
And grouchy.
And a little creepy.

Because for some weird reason knows exactly when to come outside and 'bump into' one of us.

Not even joking.
EVERY time I walk outside, he's there.
EVERY time my dad wants to work on the garden or work outside, he's there.
EVERY time anyone comes over, he's there.
EVERY time anyone ever goes out the front door, he's there.

This is why I pretend to be on my phone every time I walk from my car to my house,
See my dad peeking out the window all the time,
See my dad inside during his lunch break,
Pretend like I don't hear what he's saying,
Run into my home,
Spend all my time on the left side of my house, hidden from view,
And much more.

Well, he's a stalker, that one.
Because as soon as you walk out the door, you're no longer safe.
You are now warned.


Holly Sparks said...

weird. old. creepy. stalker..
i couldn't have chosen any better words to describe him.
and the worst part is... people dont believe me when i tell them about him.. they just say he's lonely... which he is, but he's also scary... then they meet him. and realize i was not exaggerating.

Katie Lane said...

ugh. you are so right.
People never believe us!!! He is exactly what we say he is.
He appears out of nowhere. I have no idea how he does it. I pretend my kids need me, stick my head into the car really far when pulling them out so I can seem like I can't hear him. Weirdness.

Chess said...

Yikes! That's sorta scary!