only if you like music and nerds

well, i totally just figured out how to embed music files and I'm so mega excited!

I HATE when people play music on blogs when you automatically get there and there's a cute little playlist somewhere hidden on their blog and you try so hard to find it and eventually just have to click out of their blog because it's annoying and it clashes with your music. do you know the feeling?

confession #2:
I LOVE hype machine and want to make a blog like one of the ones that they host because they inspire me. every.day.

Oh, I'm so happy.
And I know that probably everyone who reads my blog won't even care about this new discovery, but I've been trying to figure this out for like 6 months.
Go Me!

Just check this out to see how BEAUTIFUL it is!



it's over!!


After much consulting with Dr. Hoggard,

I realized that Al was a bit too controlling of my life.

So. . .. I broke up with him

I'm doing well.

I've got three good friends that have helped me through this:

Allegra, Pat, and a girl I call Rhino.

What would I do without them?


Sister Sparks. . .

How does that sound?

I think it sounds MARVELOUS.

But, I just have to wait 5 long months before I can turn in my papers

Then you can start calling me Sister Sparks.


I have a new boyfriend.

His name is Al R Gees.

Here's the details -

I've seen him every day this summer! And I'll probably see him tomorrow. .
He makes me soo nervous that I just get itchy whenever I see him. (I've even gotten hives a couple times)
My throat swells when he's around
I get up everyday and he's the first thing that I think of
I shower at least once or twice every day, just for him
I love him so much that I've even teared up quite a bit
And I've lost five pounds just for him

I think he's a keeper.
He'll for sure be around for the rest of the summer. . Maybe even longer if I'm lucky


Sometimes It's Hard

To go to work.

Knowing that I would so rather have her working with Ton than me.

Feeling guilty because it should be her. Not me.

Seeing her half completed time card with her signature.

Always coming across old notes and 'to-do' lists.

Thinking of the last time I saw her. That Friday before I left to California. At Tonya's seventeenth birthday party that she planned and put together. Right there in that house.

Reliving the time that I called Pheobe and told her of the news, starting with "There was a terrible accident. . . " and not able to complete the sentence without falling apart.

Seeing Tonya's pain from losing a best friend.

And those times that she comes up in conversation, because she's always on our minds.

And that's just at the Blackham's. . .

I miss my fourth sister.
And my two best friends (Holly and Tonya)'s best friend.


Hey Bozar!

Oh she makes me laugh.

Yesterday, she turned to my dog and said, "Hi Bozar"
(his name is Boaz)
A couple minutes later she asked,
"When can we take Bowzer on a walk?"
I giggled.

As we were walking inside, she said, "Hey Purr"
(my cat's name really is Pearl)
I asked, "Tonya, what's my cat's name?"
"It's Pearl."

Oh, what would I do without her?


Once Upon a time. . .

There was a lovely lady.
Her name was Stefanie.

She raised four beautiful daughters.
But not without pain, tears, and much needed help.

She showed these daughters that the most important decision to be made is who you marry. After 'dear john' ing three missionaries, she married a man who would not only provide her with the much needed help, but love her through everything in her life.

Determined to finish school, she set an example to her little girlies that education is essential, by getting not only her bachelors with two pooping babies, but ALSO getting her masters while she had four pooping daughters, (who by this time, had been potty trained. Thank goodness.)

As these little daughters grew up, Stefanie taught them so many important life skills, through example, 'therapy', and hard work.

She made these poor little girls clean their room before they could play,
Eat vegetables,
Milk goats,
Take back gum and apologize to the manager when they stole it from the store,
Do jobs,
Write thank-you cards,
Make snowman ornaments,
Spend time with the family,
And other things (without the children realizing that these tasks would be good).
(It is even rumored that she even made them drink hormone-free milk)

She taught them that
Sometimes talents aren't dancing, singing, and playing instruments flawlessly,
Or aren't shown with tropies.
Families are forever,
Laughter is always the best medicine (even during prayers),
Patience is essential,
You need to work hard to get what you want,
Being assertive is a good thing,
And other things

And these daughters grew up.
And realized that they never thanked Stefanie enough,
(Especially that second daughter)

Mom, I love you.
And want to thank you for all of the 'therapy' you've offered me.
And for being the understanding, caring mother that you are.
Everyday I realize that I'm growing up to be just like you.
And that makes me happy.


I learned much more than I paid for

In addition to learning how to manage a class, how to teach reading effectively, and how to be a teacher,

Throughout this year of school I also have learned

1. Best friends are the ones that are there not only for the happy times, but the times you are sad, need to cry, you need your car fixed, a laugh, or just a hug

2. Friends are forever - no matter the distance.
3. Even though you love spending time with someone, and love their presence, and so much about them, they may not be the right person for you.
4. That families really are eternal - and will be reunited again.
5. You never know when someone will leave this world. Or the impact they had on you completely until they're gone.
6. That Disneyland isn't always the happiest place on earth
7. That everyone always needs a friend
8. That I have the best, funnest, funniest family in the world!
9. To never walk up the hill to campus early in the morning right after rain - when it's still frozen. Just save time, cuts, and bruises, and ride the bus.
10. That everything happens for a reason. And sometimes, you don't know the reason, you just have to put all of your trust in Him.
11. That it's okay to cry
12. That I will never go another month without owning a library card
13. That everyone has insecurities
14. Life just is hard sometimes. And just when it seems to be getting easier, something else comes up.
15. But that's just life. And needs to be lived with a smile, like Alexis and Derek did.